I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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