Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
