Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (813): Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book http://tfl.nu/eyxq
  Replies (12) Good night (2689) Bad night (580) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (716): View more from New York

  a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (716): a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz http://tfl.nu/ffgi
  Replies (39) Good night (7684) Bad night (701) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (980): View more from North Carolina

  after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (980): after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape http://tfl.nu/d3c4
  Replies (8) Good night (3552) Bad night (683) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (731): We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country? http://tfl.nu/p4z6
  Replies (37) Good night (4547) Bad night (1062) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (509): View more from Washington

  Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (509): Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint http://tfl.nu/0n30
  Replies (10) Good night (1182) Bad night (4556) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (714): so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"? http://tfl.nu/sml3
  Replies (20) Good night (4751) Bad night (1127) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (985): when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this" http://tfl.nu/g0yg
  Replies (9) Good night (2034) Bad night (6269)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (732): It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown. http://tfl.nu/wms3
  Replies (6) Good night (5273) Bad night (770) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (559): View more from California

  He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (559): He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed. http://tfl.nu/q245
  Replies (14) Good night (1722) Bad night (1270) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (216): View more from Ohio

  Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (216): Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades. http://tfl.nu/zsau
  Replies (10) Good night (3507) Bad night (869) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (917): View more from New York City

  I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (917): I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips. http://tfl.nu/10y5
  Replies (14) Good night (3104) Bad night (1709) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (740): View more from Ohio

  He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (740): He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work" http://tfl.nu/lj9u
  Replies (6) Good night (3438) Bad night (553) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.

  (720): View more from Colorado

  When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day. (720): When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30? http://tfl.nu/a4tl
  Replies (3) Good night (1572) Bad night (390)
• Favorite

  (416): View more from Toronto

  Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (416): Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics http://tfl.nu/b7nn
  Replies (7) Good night (885) Bad night (271) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies. http://tfl.nu/6jxt
  Replies (5) Good night (1087) Bad night (263) Order T-Shirt

Randomize