also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.