I'm going to jail i love you
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
Randomize
