do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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