Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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