i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
i already hear my dad disowning me
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
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