I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
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I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
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Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
This can only be settled by a dance off.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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