i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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