out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
