I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
She had cheddar bay biscuits in her purse. Biscuits, Id and cash. I'm gonna marry her.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
