Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
he said i'm too pretty to suck penis
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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