Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
