He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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