ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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