taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
