rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
She just used a chaser for red wine.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.