seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Randomize
