i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
This toilet bowl is my home.
No dude 10 parakeets in your bedroom is 9 parakeets too many. Bring them back. Today!
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