she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Randomize
