I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
