i don't really know how much tequila is too much
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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