dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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