I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
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