By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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