Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize