oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
