I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
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