So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
I can tuck mytits in my pants
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
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