Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Randomize
