I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
So I slept with some guy last night and when I woke up in the am couldnt remember his name. I text him n asked "How do you spell your name?" to try n find out and all he replied was "With an A." WTF!?
Randomize