my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
and you fell through a lawn chair
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
