so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
No no no no no no.... That's my emergency bottle for when I realize I've hit rock bottom
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
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