i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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