I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
Randomize
