I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
operation harelip BJ is a go
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize
