my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
