OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
