wanna go halves on a baby?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
It got weird I got a phone call while looking at porn and the video started playing while on the phone full on porn audio.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
