talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize