i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Randomize
