Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
