I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
I'm too high and old for this...
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
