Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize