White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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