This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
So there i was right, midnight, washing my junk off in my bathroom sink.
Randomize
