they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm prostituting myself for tickets to Disney World. There's a contradiction there.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
