I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
