i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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