I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
I woke up because I was nodding to the dream question of "would you like a sombrero?"
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
Randomize
